Our Blog

Read the Latest Articles About Getting Your Ex Back

Check out some tips for reducing this kind of suffering

Reducing the suffering of a separation

Sometimes we're taken by surprise on how much the pain of a separation feelis like a physical pain.

In reality, it's actually somewhat physycal!

When you are going through a strong emotional crisis, your brain will find the pain signal in the same place it would search for it's pain when you hit your toe on a table.

The problem with emotional pain is that it is more persistent.

While your toe will probably heal very quickly, as long as your emotional crisis is not properly addressed, you will keep suffering.

Many people in a sense of desperation to make the suffering go away, may engage in a a series of harmful behaviors, such as drinking too much, abusing drugs, or even overeating.

Part of the problem with these solutions is they may actually bring some "results" in the short-term. But the next moment you will be in a much worse situation than you were initially.

The goal for this article is to give you four techniques that you can apply TODAY in order to reduce the suffering post-breakup. Without the aid of alcohol, drugs, or some other complicated exercises.

Technique number 1: "A moment of joy per day"

This technique is very simple. You are to have a moment of joy every day, WITHOUT EXCEPTIONS.

Have a journal, and as soon as you have achieved your moment of joy for that day, record it with a positive sign!

It can be a peaceful moment, a sensation of well-being, a smile on your face, or even if something cool has happened to you on that day.

Doing this, you will reinforce the perception in your brain that you are able to feel good every day, albeit for a short period of time.

Even in what appears to be the depths of your suffering, you will begin feeling more confident in your ability to overcome the crisis.

But this is not the only benefit of this technique. The other positive point is that with it, you will force your mind to always seek more positive emotions and then you will be better able to understand your emotional framework.

So, instead of sinking into negative emotions, which is probably your tendency right now, you will gain a better understanding of how these emotions work in your mental space and how would you go about avoiding them.

The result will be you will not have one... but many positive moments every day! And that way you will be much closer to achieve your initial goal of saving your relationship.

Technique number 2: Repetition of a word

This is a powerful meditation exercise I found in one of my favorite personal development books.

Again, the principle is very simple, what you should is repeat a given word in your mind.

Any word will do, except for the name of your EX, of course.

As soon as negative thoughts enter your mind and begin torturing you, repeat the word mentally.

This will allow your mind to momentarily block the flow of toxic thoughts.

One interesting thing you'll notice is that after repeating a few times, the word will lose its original meaning, and afterwards it will have a whole other meaning to you.

And then you will be able to use it to express hidden emotions that you didn't even know how could you call it. Try it!

Technique number 3: Have a personal list of songs that brings you positive emotions

At such a delicate moment it is important you pay attention to the kind of music you listen to.

The right music can may be able to lift up your spirits, make you more happier, and improve your mood just enough for making you get through another day. But the wrong one have the power to take you to the bottom of the pit of tears and make you think there is no way out, or even think you wouldn't want one.

Have a pre-selected song list that you know had lift you up in the past.

Technique number 4: neurolinguistic anchoring

This is a coaching technique.

The idea here is to create an association between a given gesture and a positive emotion.

The human brain uses different kinds of association to organize the information it has to process, and creates neural connections to link one element to another.

For instance, you may associate the sight of a red light with danger. When that happens, any time you see a red light, your brain will strengthen direct neural connections between the concrete stimulus - the sight of a red light - and the neurons responsible for the learnt response.

Using this body feature, we are able to create positive emotions whenever we feel like it.

It works like this

Choose a very positive and powerful memory, for instance, the pleasure sensation you felt in your body when you discovered the most beautiful place you've ever seen. Or when you felt the pride of your parents the day you entered college. Or even a surprise party your friends arranged for you.

Try relieving that moment, the same emotions, and the same feelings.

Perform a non-accidental gesture, such as closing your left wrist, touching your belly, or squeazing your ear lobes.

Repeat this combination a dozen times a day for several weeks. Relieving the emotions of this wonderful moment in memory and performing the gesture you have chosen.

After a few weeks, you will notice that by performing the gesture you've previously programmed into your sub-conscious, the emotions you associated with the gesture will be more readily available.

And if you find this is not enough, you can take a look at our Get Your Ex Back Manual.

 

Related Articles

I miss my ex, what should I do?

Find out what should you do when you're missing your ex so much. There are people who, upon leaving our lives, seem to leave the whole world unpopulated. After breakup, this desire gets much more...

Give Us Your Opinion

Do You Have An Idea For An Article, Or Want To Clarify Any Doubts? Tell us About it.
Submit Your Opinion